For each installment of the 31 Days In The Life of A Single Working Mom series, I will feature an interview with a single working mom.
Each day in October, we will gain insights into the life of a single mom and specifically learn what she does to keep it all together and stay encouraged!
Today’s featured mom is Krista.
Tell us about yourself and your child(ren) (# of children, gender and ages).
I am a thirty-something, mom to 3 children, 1 son and 2 daughters. My son, Christian, is 11 years old. Then my daughter Gabriella is 9, and my baby, Elizabeth is 7.
Where do you live?
We live in a very small town in Kentucky. The town has about 50,000 residents. The town is called, Pikeville.
What do you do for a living?
As of right now I am getting ready to go back to college to finish my bachelor degree. I took some time off to spend with my kids before school starts for me.
How do you fit blogging into the mix (if it’s not your “day job”)?
I find time usually at night or very early in the morning to do the blogging. We also had a vlogging channel on YouTube that we did daily. After I started that I slacked off on the blogging. But would love to start back to inform people of what it is like to be a single mom and the struggles that we go through.
How long have you been a single mom? What were the circumstances which lead you to become a single mom?
I have always been a single mom, in fact, I wanted to be a single mom from the start. I love the fact that how my children are raised is all on me and I don’t have to worry about incorporating my partner say so on parenting.
Is your child(ren)’s father(s) involved; are you able to co-parent your child(ren)? What does that look like?
I am willing and able and does co-parent. The kids see their dad any time that is within reason. For example they talk to them all the time. But sometimes they have to work and can’t see them everyday but do see them several times a week.
What is your typical day like?
My typical school day is me getting up about 6:15 to get myself ready for the day. Then 6:50 get the kids up so they can get ready for school. And with that I have to do the girls hair and also help pack lunches and make sure that everyone has break money and shoes are on right before we head out the door at 7:25. Since I don’t work right now I usually come home and clean house and do a couple loads of laundry. And if I need to get groceries I will do so before I pick the kids up at 3.
After school it is a race against time all day, every day. With that being said I cook supper for the kids, do homework and help with studying any test they may have. Then it is time to make sure they take showers and get ready for the next day. This is also when I would iron their clothes and clean out lunch boxes.
By 9:00pm the kids need a light snack so that they can brush teeth and be in the bed by 9:30. I have the lights off in my house around 9:45. After the kids go to bed, I usually stay up and pick up a little before I go to bed about 10:30 or 11. This is a typical day, and can and does change due to having errands to run and the kids being sick or going out to eat after the kids get home from school.
How do you handle day to day responsibilities (meals, laundry, cleaning, chauffeuring kids, Dr. appointments, school meetings, etc.)?
I handle it so much better now that I am not working at the moment. It is so much easier cause I don’t need someone to pick up a child to take them anywhere anymore. I do it all on my own now and I handle it with ease as I am not worried about someone forgetting to pick them up.
What’s the best thing about being a single mom? What’s the hardest thing?
The best thing about being a single mom is I get to raise my kids the way that I want them raised! The hardest thing about being a single mom is it is all on me. If it doesn’t get done it is all my fault. Honestly the good out weighs the bad!
What struggles do you experience as a single mom?
One of the things that I have always struggled with is money. It is so hard and such a struggle to only have one income coming into the house. It is a balance that you have to get just perfectly right to make sure you have the right amount of money. Other than that I am lucky not to have to many struggles.
Are you able to be vulnerable and authentic with anyone regarding the struggles of being a single mom If so, who and when?
I have had other women ask me what it is like to be a single mom. I have not only told them what being a single mom is like but I have allowed people to spend a day with me and get a inside glimpse on what it is really like. There have been several people that wanted to be single moms that have since become single moms and there have been several that have seen that being a single mom is not something that they can handle. So I have been authentic about the life of a single mom and I will always be authentic as I don’t see any reason why I should sugarcoat my life. My life as a single mom is not easy but it ain’t as hard as one would think!
What one or two thing(s) keep you up at night?
One thing that always keeps me up at night is worrying that my children won’t have the same experiences as child that come from a two parent household. And I always worry about having enough money for me and the kids to survive on.
Are you currently dating or in a relationship?
I am not currently in a relationship and haven’t been in a long while!
Would you like to be married?
I would like to be married on most days and then I will get into a mood and say to all that ask that I don’t want to be married. So, I may say yes to you on this day but no to you on the very next day. My heart is saying no but my brain is saying yes….
If you are dating or in a relationship, how do you fit your partner into your presumably busy life?
I am not in a relationship at the time. And honestly with my 3 kids I don’t know how and when I would find time for a partner at all.
When (if ever) do/did you introduce your kids to your significant other?
I would have to be dating the person for a couple months before I introduce my kids to my boyfriend. Beforehand I would have to talk to my boyfriend to make sure that him and I was on the same page. I don’t want no one to date me that is not willing to accept my kids. We come as a package and you can’t and won’t split us up.
Do you ever get lonely? If so, when and what do you do about it?
I do get lonely sometimes it is mainly at night when I am laying in bed. And usually if I do feel that way I will watch a movie or play a game on my phone to get it out of my mind. There are nights that I have laid and cry myself to sleep. But the next day being busy with the kids I usually don’t have time to dwell on the being lonely part.
What do you miss most about being in a relationship or marriage (if you were married)?
I have never been married but have been in a relationship with the kids dad. And honestly the thing that I miss most is having a companion. I like having someone there to be on my side and my shoulder if I need to cry. I miss someone being there for me.
What are your top 3(or more) tips for keeping everything together?
My main important tip is to take care of yourself and your needs. Without taking care of myself I can’t hold it together for my kids. The second thing is to have support. Everyone needs support no matter if you are single or not. The last thing is having rules. I have rules for everything in life and not only me but my kids as well. We live by them and it keeps our lives running smooth and so that we all can be on the same page.
If you believe in prayer, what three things do you pray about regularly?
I do believe in praying and do pray all the time. The first thing I pray about is my children health. I want them to be healthy and to live a healthy life. The second thing that I pray about is finances. I know that this is something that I really should pray about. But I want to make sure that the money is coming in to help with the kids. The last thing that I pray for is myself. I pray that I can stay healthy so that I can raise my kids without any problems in my health.
What are your dreams for yourself and for your children?
I have dreams that someday I will be able to buy us a house and not have to live in a apartment anymore. And for my kids I just hope that they grow up and become successful individuals and they are happy people that love to help people.
What one lesson do you want your child(ren) to learn from your journey as a single mom?
I want them to see the hardships that I have gone through and not make the mistakes that I have made. I want them to go to school and graduate college before they decide to become parents.
Is there anything else you’d like to add that you think would encourage other single moms?
I think that all moms have struggles and all of our lives are different but we all struggle. And the one thing that I can say is not to be jealous of other moms that are making it better than you. But to stay level headed and stay focus on your family and not let the bad comments hurt you just keep doing what you are doing. I think that all single mom are great mom not only that but we are STRONG individuals who has went through a great deal to keep our chin held high to keep fighting the good fight for our kids!
Where to find Krista online:
Blog: A Journey of a Single Mommy
Krista uses her blog to share with her readers the reality of beign a single mommy. Usually that includes sharing things that are just on her mind and things that she wants to get off my chest!
YouTube: Single Mommy Everyday Life!
What tips or words of wisdom from Krista’s journey, did you find helpful to use in your own journey?
Let me know in the comments below. If you have an extra moment, head over to Krista’s website and show her some love!
If YOU would like to be featured, send an email to LC@alifeofauthenticity.com. If all of the October spots have been filled, I will feature your interview in a continued series.